Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Object Lesson In Expectations

This "slave" spent a week getting pretty much 24/7 access to me (While we waited for the day when he was available for a cam verification). During that week of conversation, I clearly and repeatedly stated that while I was willing to do a cam verification with him, I would not, under any circumstances, play with him or scene with him during the verification. I was happy to talk to him, let him talk with me and even let him show me his body because he felt it was necessary, but that was it. I also made it abundantly clear that I was far less interested in his physical look than I was in his ability and desire to be obedient.
After many disconnections because his internet connection was bad, we spent about 45 minutes on video call with Skype. When I put my foot down and refused to direct him to use the "toys" he had laid out for the verification, he signed off, all the while promising to complete my contract and make his tribute.
That was May 10th. This morning he decided to contact me and this is the exchange.
The lesson to be learned here, for anyone interested in contacting me, is that when I say I will or will not do something, I mean it. I neither promise nor threaten that which I will not do.

I have no problem verifying with a slave or talking with them before the first tribute. However, I am going to be blunt and honest with you during that time. I will tell you what I am and am not willing to do and what I expect from you. When you choose not to complete my expectations while simultaneously ignoring what I've told you are my limits, you will find that I am not particularly forgiving. At least not without significant begging and very large tributes.


oliver: yes i did and i did not log in since that day, this is my first time to log in,
8:54Me: And that means what to me at this point? 
8:54oliver: i was disappointed. this what my reason, i did not want to tell u this.
8:54Me: you were disappointed because you didn't get what you wanted. Tough 
8:55oliver: i was impressed during our conversation, but when we met, i also was impressed by the way u look, but i got disppointed by the way u treated my with.
i did not feel happy
8:56Me: You wasted a significant amount of my time over most of a week and when I put my foot down about refusing to play with you until you tributed, you disappeared. 
awww...you weren't happy. Well I sure wasn't happy to have had my time wasted. Do you have any idea what I normally charge for the kind of contact you got for FREE? 
8:58I told you, repeatedly, that I would NOT play with you during that first meeting and yet that was what you wanted. When you didn't get it, you disappeared completely. If you were disappointed, it was your own fault. 
Unless you intend to actually tribute and beg my forgiveness, I'm done with you. 
8:58oliver: i felt that u did not care of the way your slave look or can do.
8:59Me: How many times do I have to say it....because this is definitely not the first...I don't care what you look like, I only care about obedience, which you absolutely have not demonstrated. 
9:00oliver: i did not feel happy even during your veriifcation to me, you were too careless. i feel that u do not took it serouisly and it was all just to have a tribute
9:01Me: Bullshit. I saw what I wanted to see. YOU didn't get what you wanted. I'm done. 
Up until YOU decided you weren't getting what you wanted, you were being obedient. I repeatedly told you that was what I cared about. 
9:01oliver: yes u see what u wanted, but i was not happy from the way you handle me as a slave.
i am also done with you.
9:02Me: Fine. We're obviously not a good match. You refuse to be obedient and I have wasted far too much time with you. 
Enjoy being banned from findomsandbeyond. 
9:02oliver: i pay my mistress, so it is my right to have the mistress which makes me happy
9:02Me: wow...you don't get it at all 
9:02oliver: i did not go there since that time
and i do not want to be there
9:02Me: well you're banned 
9:02oliver: i already gave u my user and pass , i trusted u
9:03Me: I didn't change anything, I simply reported your behavior to the owner of the site. 
9:03oliver: i do not care about that site anymore.
9:03Me: I trusted you too and you broke that trust on its first test. 
9:03oliver: i even did not try to log in there since we talked
9:04actually i felt the same
9:04Me: because I didn't want to see you stick a screw driver up your ass?
9:05oliver: u want me to be honset ot not
9:07Me: I wanted you to be obedient and have a little patience. YOU got every verification you asked for. I got NONE of the tasks completed that I asked for...that you put off until YOU got what YOU wanted. I gave you one parameter for that verification session--that I would not play with you--and since that was all you were interested in, you disappeared when it became clear that I wasn't going to do what YOU wanted. So you got 90% of what you wanted and I got nothing but wasted time. How's that for honest? 
9:11oliver: it was about my feeling from your way of treatment to me. it was very routine, careless, sorry to tell boring. maybe because u just wakeup. but i felt that i was alone, i did not feel your power.
9:18i did not hve bad intention at all. all what i wanted is super mistress and i did not feel this with you. maybe because all the time you were thinking i have bad intention, so u did not take my serousily. i do not know!
9:20Me: Yes, I thought you were probably wasting my time. And a "super mistress' is, apparently by your definition, one who does what YOU want. I'm not that kind of dominant. While I care about what those who serve me like and don't like and what they might want to experience, when I say I won't do something, continuing to expect that I will change my mind is not going to make me more likely to give a servant anything they want. It's much more likely to make me angry. 
considering how you disappeared, I felt pretty sure I had been right about how much you were wasting my time. 
9:21obedience=reward 
demands and disobedience=punishment 

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